The Good Junk

Outside at nighttime, there is a well lit vending machine on an empty sidewalk. A city bus is parked beside it.

What we eat can affect our mental health, our bodily functions, and our confidence. Some of us are ‘too busy’ to prepare a meal or sit down in a cafe to ingest a plate of nutrition, and there’s a vending machine down the hall, beautifully lit, calling your name. You wanted the cheesy corn puffs, but they remind you too much of bad politics. Forget that. Hmmm…peanut butter crackers? Eh. Had those yesterday and they were so dry. Gum? That would help produce saliva and not be dry. Then you realize, it’s just all junk, but you’re starving. So what’s a fabulous woman like yourself to do?

Think it through, girl. Think it through. Looking at the items that aren’t sold out or jammed, what has something that could be of some teensy bit of benefit to your body? Rock hard granola bar? Nah. Caramel coated popcorn? Too sticky. If you could just hold out until you get to your destination. This risks the chance of becoming itchy, bitchy, and twitchy. So make a decision already!

A billion years ago, I worked in a hospital. Some days I would be too busy for lunch and would walk to the snack machines. My go-to was a Snickers bar. Hello protein! I would count the peanuts and soy lecithin (controversial) as something my body loves me for. Yes, there’s sugar. Yes, there are calories. But…in a pinch, it was the healthiest thing in the junk machine. However, they’re not that healthy.

Yes, we can get out of shape from eating junk all the time – trust me, it happened over the pandemic. Make a rule to only have soda, nacho cheese dip (wait – what?), and other tasty crap, outside of the home. Or buy it only if you’re having a get together. When there’s a party going on, all food is good for you! If you know you’re gonna be away from home for extended hours and will need a meal eventually, pack a healthy snack. Then you won’t be tempted to get prepackaged food from a glowing machine that could possibly be home to cockroaches or worse. I know.

Ask yourself one question before consuming: Does my body love me for this? Regardless of the amount of calories, is there nutritional benefit as well?

I sure do wish the jarred nacho dip had an ingredient that my body loved. That ain’t real cheese.

Big Role Media

Writer, storyteller, comedian, banjo picker, dog petter, potato enthusiast living in Los Angeles, CA.

Spill it, girl.

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